Restraining Order Terrorism

Seven years in hell

Mix one part Violence Against Women Act, one part Patriot Act, one part Duluth Model, and shake like crazy. Strain and serve during court hearings over a rocky custody battle to a drug-abusing ex-wife. The toxic, teeth-rattling backlash will make chemotherapy seem like a cakewalk. Just ask our intrepid Della Burton, who saw the whole excruciating ordeal play out first hand. [Illustration by Typhonblue]