Draft feminists, not beer

As a kid with a professor dad, I grew up on a college campus during the Vietnam war. My daycare from age 4 was spent in Physical Chemistry classes with my father, answering questions he had carefully coached me on once his students were stumped. My other memories of that time were the pervasive anxieties of the students over the military draft. Draft day was a nightmare even for a kid like me seeing the terrible stress those of draft age were going through. Draft beer, not people was a popular t-shirt of that time. Today, however, beer is a part of rape culture, so we need so find someone new to draft.

Do you remember the case about three years ago wherein a feminist lawyer’s son was falsely accused of rape? Millions of young women are about to be just as verklempt as mommy Judith Grossman, Esq., was when the next consequence of feminism hits home like an AK-47 on full auto: conscription – the military draft – may be coming for the clown hairs cowering in their safe spaces.

Two current and one former GOP presidential candidate (Rubio, Bush, and Christie, respectively) have already endorsed Selective Service for women, and full combat roles for women become operational on April Fools’ Day, appropriately. I believe the female draft and front line combat will transform both women and society in profound ways that will make people treat feminists in the same way that ISIS treats infidels.

As a Men’s Rights Advocate and egalitarian I believe that women and men should have the same rights and responsibilities. It is this insistence on responsibilities that distinguishes MRAs the most from feminists who want all the perks of men but none of the pain. As things stand today, men must register for the draft to earn the right to vote, get government services, and avoid jail. Women get these privileges for free. The feminine insistence on a level of safety and privilege that men do not enjoy is about to come to a brutal end, and it is about fucking time women learn in the most violent possible ways what being a man is really like.

It’s not like a microaggression at all.

Already feminists are recoiling in shock from a flavor of gender equality that reeks with all the savor of the piss bucket on a crab boat. No one should be drafted! They moan, and even, please don’t protect us from rapists!

They would actually rather be fucked than fight nonconsensually. The horror of rape has finally been exceeded.

Conservative gynocentrists are also horrified:

  • In Threats Of Drafting Women Reveal The Lies Of Equality author D.C. McAllister at The Federalist, after giving a nice history of previous attempts to draft women, conflated legal gender equality with political correctness. She went on to wonder “What will be the societal impact of sending our daughters into harm’s way, along with our sons, having them return home with missing limbs, debilitating head injuries, and broken spirits?” That’s easy to answer, D.C.: feminism will die in the public eye, or in combat – take your pick.

Can drafted women soldiers function in combat?

Although each combat soldier might have eight or more soldiers behind her in command and support roles, those positions are usually filled by career soldiers; drafted personnel historically go disproportionately into combat roles for their limited service terms. Whether women and especially privileged American women, can be effective in combat is a controversial question.

As of 2013, eight nations formally allowed or forced conscripted women into combat roles with varying degrees of success. Of course, none of those nations have the female obesity or feminist “fat acceptance” movements to the level of the US, so our basic training regimens will need some heavy retooling.

Likewise, in the short term, drafting feminists will bring a bumper crop of rape and harassment hoaxers into the service, which is already suffering losses of morale and seasoned male personnel as a result of those false and feminizing tropes.

The solution to this is obvious: instead of sensitivity training for innocent men, the military should enforce temporary gender segregation during both training and new deployment until women soldiers harden and mature enough to accept adult responsibilities like those expected of men. After, say, three to six months of front line combat in all-female units, surviving, seasoned female troops, if any, should be toughened to the point where integration with their male counterparts can be explored.

This gender integration would be conditional on operational efficiency as well as male soldiers maintaining discipline and avoiding chivalrous protection of female soldiers, as well as female soldiers rejecting pregnancies and other bellyaching that undermine unit cohesiveness. Female troops can be instructed to regulate each others’ sexual continence and complaints the way women naturally “slut shame” each other in civilian life: a cadre of undisciplined women soldiers would lose the right to serve in integrated combat units once their fertility exceeded certain norms, making this sort of discipline contagious throughout the female ranks.

Society transformed

The first female conscripts should come from women’s studies classes as well as hair coloring services that support neon shades. Feminist women, true to their insistence on gender equality and closets festooned with combat boots, should make excellent and compliant candidates for front line duty.

Over time, with the series of future wars the US is facing over dwindling resources, hostile ideologies, religions, and Canadian queefing, parents will increase their insistence on fitness in all their children, girls included, or face the prospect of societal disapprobation as well as the slaughter of daughters. American education will have to swing back to the boisterous boy (plus girl, now) model of the draft-heavy 1960’s rather than the drug-addled ADHD model of feminized childhood we see today.

The ideals of a modified gallantry as a precursor to military discipline instilled in boys will necessarily have to be spread to girls:

  • Self-control
  • Stoicism
  • Reason over feelings
  • Competition, teamwork, and sportsmanship
  • Glorious self-sacrifice for others
  • The rejection of the weak and frivolous
  • The priority of conformity over excessive individuality

Girls, who feminists tell us are equal, and even superior to boys should have no trouble picking this up. This is the feminist Lean In on both a diet and testosterone: society will teach our children to become gender neutral in a whole new way. Childhood traits we now see as masculine will become universal traits, and those we see as feminine will go extinct for those at or below military age, and perhaps beyond. The safe space will become the sparing chamber. Dollhouses will be forts. Princess tea parties will give way to war games.

Unicorns: weaponized. Sparkles: thermite.

Move over, Spartans. The Amazons are coming.

Of course, society could tilt the opposite way, embrace both the masculine and the feminine, and drive feminists back into the oblivion they so richly deserve.

We thank you for your service, ladies.

Recommended Content